I'm sorry it's been a few months since my last post. I have been following a lot of the cuckold and fem-dom graphical logs on Tumblr. But frankly, I find that nothing beats the written communication from a real blog. However, it does require a lot more time investment. A few of you seem to enjoy it at least, and it's a great venting and release opportunity for me.
For those of you into cuckolding, femdom, or some of these related kinks, I am betting that this entry will ring true with you. I am writing about the evolution...the changes in the relationship and in our sexuality that seem to progress from the first time your lady fucks another man, or from the first time you suck cock or wear panties, etc. It's amazing to me how we grow and change.
There are even physical changes in me that are more and more evident. First, there is no doubt that my problem with premature ejaculation has gotten worse! I am almost certainly worse at fucking her than I was a year ago. Some of this is no doubt because of her enjoyment of teasing me with relentless hand jobs and slutty talk. She strokes and plays with my cock almost constantly and I'm constantly begging her to stop or take it easy on me. We have an understanding that ALL my orgasms are to be controlled by her. This means that I cannot make myself cum without her permission or participation. I do wear the chastity cage a good bit, but not constantly. So, when she is playing with me, I always assume she will ultimately want me to fuck her...so I'm fearful that I'll cum to fast. She is relentless and does not listen to me very well...most of the time she stops in time to leave me dripping at the edge. However, she also likes to ruin my orgasms. It's happened dozens of times now and her sympathy for my plight during a ruined orgasm is noticeably less.
So, with all this stimulation and orgasm denial, maybe it's not surprising that my control over my orgasms is getting worse. I should note that I have never cum without stimulation or before entering her...so I guess my problem isn't as extreme as some guys. In order to be clear, let me give a little more information. For instance, if she takes my cock out and starts pumping me with the intent to get me close, then it requires well under a minute to get me to the edge...from 5 to 50 strokes I think. If it's fucking though, it can be much worse....from 1 stroke to 20 strokes is common. This has been frustrating for her, so we've used the cock sleeve/extension quite a bit.
I have read elsewhere that chastity cages can lead to problems sustaining erections and premature cumming. In my case, this is definitely true...being denied for a week or more will always lead to a quick pop. Both she and I have the dream that we will find her a few regular guys who can always give her the hard and long fucking that she needs, so the consequences of my cumming are mitigated. She fucks a few guys, but none are very regular at the moment...still an ongoing search. But in the mean time, my lady has had to be satisfied with getting off on her fingers, the vibrator, my tongue, or the cock sleeve.
This in turn just makes me feel more submissive and feminine. She enjoys my cumming...laughs a lot, feeds me a lot of cum, plus she also knows that I love the humiliation. Maybe this is some kind of process that makes me subservient to her, more sissified, or something like that. Just this weekend after talking her through a wonderful orgasm and giving her lots of tongue and helping her use her vibrator, she commented on being completely satisfied...not needing my cock. It had been days since I'd cum, so she let me fuck her hand to a ruined orgasm. Then later when I begged and got her off again on her vibe and fingers, she let me slip my cock into her drenched pussy after her orgasm. I got my "little cock" in, but she wriggled her ass and pussy and pulled the cum out before I could complete 5 strokes. She laughed and pushed my cock out, asking if I enjoyed my "little pity fuck".
She knows I like to service a local guy orally...in fact, she encourages me to do it as long as I don't cum from it. He isn't interested in touching me or my pleasure, so that's not a problem. I wear panties quite often, in part so I feel more feminine and submissive to him. I have also totally shaved my cock and balls, just because it looks better in panties and chastity cages...she completely agrees.
She claims that she doesn't want me too feminine and I'm not a sissy...but my shaved cock sure looks feminine in panties! She also feeds me a lot of cum and encourages me to suck cock whenever I can. She has fucked some big cocks lately, and I'm so proud that she admits to wanting a regular fuck mate with a bigger cock and better control than mine. Hell, her biggest fantasy is to have a dominant man fuck her good while talking to me and demonstrating how a "real man" fucks her!
Even as I get myself to the edge and know that I will not break the rules and cum without her permission, I feel desperately slutty and needy. But now things have changed...I now NEED to feel slutty and needy in order to cum!
I hope you enjoy and I'd love to hear from you on here or at my email: curiousrob9900 at yahoo dot com.
45 Days
1 week ago
